if ya wanna help a disabled black trans person get to a safe place now is your chance! i could use all the help i can get!
PayPal.me/astrovagant
im currently living with my abuser again and to top it off i forgot to return my textbook rental in time and got charged the full price for it so my bank account is overdrafted. i missed six days of work because of work being closed for the holidays so this overdraft is gonna be the entirety of my paycheck, if not more. and to top it all off my abuser lives a 20 minute drive from my job and her car broke down so i have to bus/Uber to work until it gets fixed, which i can’t afford considering i don’t even have money to eat. pls help me if you can. i can’t afford an overdraft fee on top of this.
⚡️ If you want to manifest something quick don’t ask for something specific, ask for something general like “a great opportunity/experience” this way you don’t have to face limiting beliefs.
⚡️ Say “wouldn’t it be nice if…” when you are in a good/happy state of mind (and then move on with your day)
⚡️ Write your abundance log! It will make you feel better (and will help you with your vibrations/manifestation abilities)
⚡️ Be grateful for something!! (As many things as you can but one thing is completely fine)
⚡️ Are you running late? Stop for a sec, breathe in and say “I’ll be there in time”, keep doing whatever you need to do (it works for me every single time)
⚡️Do you feel lost? Ask for a sign! Don’t be afraid of saying “universe (god/spirits…) give me a VERY clear sign!” (Or ask yourself for the sign you want to see)
⚡️ Be careful of how you speak. Say “I don’t master my drawing skills yet” instead of “I can’t draw fml”
⚡️ Don’t bottle up your emotions. Are you angry/sad/whatever??? Accept it, experience it and go and do something you like. (If you deny emotions you’ll keep attracting situations where you’ll have to feel that emotion over and over again because you’ll be operating from that low vibration)
⚡️ Think about the time you manifested something and feel that excitement again!
⚡️ Ask how you can improve your relationship with yourself. Are you denying anything to yourself?? Do you really want to do something?? Act accordingly (if you feel good about yourself you won’t have thoughts like “ohh but I don’t deserve this!!”)
⚡️ Do/go through your manifestation board on Pinterest and keep pinning stuff (it has to feel fun and easy)
⚡️ Having trouble letting go? Try to physically do something else. If you’re expecting a phone call put your phone down and go out/read a book/do your laundry…
⚡️ Having more trouble letting go?? Repeat to yourself “I need to let go, I need to let go, I let go” and do a little shake with your body (I usually shake my shoulders, arms or hands depending on where I am)
Note: this is all from personal experience, doesn’t mean it’s the ultimate truth. Just some tricks that work for me and hope they can help you manifesting things in your life.
So this is just a PSA, y'all should never sign a contract until you read it. I’m talking in rl right now. I just got through reading my employee handbook/service contract and my bosses slipped in a lot of bullshit like telling me I can’t complain about my job on social media, demanding I work off the clock in the name of good service, expects me to show up on time during inclimate weather, and considered disability or religious accommodation a direct threat to the company.
These are all things I took issue with and brought to my employer for further discussion before signing the contract. Most of my coworkers signed without reading, treating it like an internet terms of service contract.
Tl;dr real life is serious shit, lawyers write contracts to protect your employer FROM YOU, read contracts before you sign them - fucking ARGUE about contracts before you sign them
Also important to note, and something my bf has repeated to me many times: a contract is a negotiation until it is signed, and YOU ARE ALLOWED TO AMEND IT. Tech companies often put some bs in there about “we own everything you make while you work for us” which broadly applied also means anything done on your own time. He always ALWAYS does write-in amendments with initial and date to state that they only own things done FOR the company, on company time, because there have been companies that enforced that bullshit when somebody had a personal side project the company decided they wanted to steal. There’s only one company that threw a fit at his attempts to amend it and he considered that a huge red flag and refused to sign, turned down the job.
Never. EVER. Sign shit without reading it. Also: if your prospective employer won’t let you take the thing home to read before you sign it and says you need to sign it then and there THAT IS A RED FLAG. The job I had that turned out to be abusive as shit was like that. Every other job I’ve been able to bring the contract home to my parents to have a more experienced set of eyes on it. It’s also common practice in some fields to have one’s attorney look over it before signing. So never let them tell you that you can’t look over it with someone else. That’s a fat load of shit. For “lower level” jobs they may not accept amendments to the contract but if they won’t even give you the proper time to read it over, they’re trying to pull some bullshit on you and you’re going to regret it if you sign. Even if there’s nothing bad in what you signed it’s an example of how they are going to treat you while you’re there. Take it to heart and run like fucking hell.
Please also tell your coworkers. Inform others. Tell everyone. Please, for the lovee of everything TELL PEOPLE THEY ARE ALLOWED TO DO THESE THINGS.
Companies BANK on the fact you’re not going to read it. Then they slip in shit like ‘you can’t talk about your wages’ because they want you to keep quiet, so thy can pay that guy six bucks, and pay the guy over there fifteen and pay you eight. They want you to accept it all blindly. PLEASE DON’T STAY BLIND.
Yes, I’ve lost out on jobs because I wanted to read it and they didn’t want me to. Or they wanted m to resign and I said no to to the things they added that I pointed out were unfair and borderline illegal.
Read shit. Tell everyone else to read shit. BE INFORMED.
Absolutely 100% good advice ☝🏼☝🏼☝🏼
Never ever ever sign shit without reading and re-reading it! Take it home, show it to someone more experienced, if you can, show it to a lawyer. A contract is supposed to work for both sides. A company in Toronto tried to make me sign a contract with clause that in event of me leaving the job I will not work in a similar position anywhere in Ontario. Yeah, right, not enforceable in court, dudes, you can’t prevent me from making a living. Read the shit and don’t let them intimidate you.
The last thing - with stuff being unenforceable by law - is also important! It’s important not to be overawed by the power of the company or other entity.
Also, some liability disclaimers are paper thin once lawyers become involved.
Hell, Target pulls the ‘we own everything you make‘ bull on seasonal workers. It’s very common.
And companies will sue for breach of contract over it.
This also goes for freelance contracts.
I once had a company slide into their NDA, before we had even discussed compensation, that anything I wrote that was “similar” to what I’d be working on for them belonged to them. It was so broadly worded, that anything I wrote with a contemporary setting would belong to these people…including the web serial I was writing and publishing at the time. Full rights.
I told them I could not sign it as stands and attempted to open negotiations.
I never heard from them again. I strongly feel I dodged a bullet.
Never, ever sign a non-compete clause unless it is extremely narrow. “Don’t take our stuff and sell it” is fine.
“We own everything you make” is not fine.
I also had a temp employer try to do a milder version, which was “Anything you write during your commute.” Uh, right. You going to pay me for my commute time then. I refused to sign and did not get the job.
Unless you are literally at the “Can’t pay my rent/food bill” point? It is better not to get the job or gig than to be locked into an aggressive non-compete.
With the legally-required disclaimer that I’m not a lawyer, watch for these in publication contracts and NDAs:
Overly broad non-competes. “Please don’t self publish a book the same month we’re releasing your book” is fine and only good manners. “You aren’t allowed to self publish for the life of this contract” is a red flag.
On the same note, overly broad first refusal clauses. Don’t sign with a publisher who insists that they have to have first refusal on every single book you write for the length of the contract. Often they will sit on your books for months, even if they don’t publish that genre. However, it is always polite to give first refusal on sequels and other books set in the same world.
Life of copyright clauses. For the love of little puppies and kittens: Never. Sign. A. Life. Of. Copyright. Contract. (Work for hire is obviously a different situation. I’m talking for original work here). Contracts should have a specified term in years, after which your rights automatically revert if you don’t renegotiate. Automatically. You shouldn’t have to request them.
Signing over rights the publisher doesn’t intend to exercise. Don’t sign over audio rights unless the publisher has a solid record of producing audio books (if they do have a solid record of it then do give them audio rights and make them pay the production costs). Don’t sign over movie rights to a book publisher! Yes, I have seen this. The publisher was Curiosity Quill. They have since imploded. If a publisher is e-only ask about splitting off the print rights.
For work for hire contracts, then you are signing over all the rights in the contract. (Editing contracts are always work for hire). An NDA is standard and don’t be afraid to sign one even if they’re scary, just make sure they don’t hide anything nasty in it. A standard NDA should boil down to “Please don’t share the files with anyone and please don’t talk about the project publicly without our permission.” I personally treat every project as under an NDA even if I haven’t signed one…you’ll see me talk occasionally about “This project I can’t talk about is taking up my time.” That means I’m either under an NDA or I should be if the publisher had any sense.
The “opposite” of an NDA is a required publicity clause. Be careful of these: Make sure you aren’t responsible for the results. Usually they aren’t too onerous, though. It’s more like “Would you please share the kickstarter with all of your Facebook friends.” I also had one which required me to post the release of the anthology to my blog. Usually they’re no big deal, but watch out for pressure being put on you to do a ton of marketing on a small thing like a short story. It can take you away from marketing stuff which really needs it.
Tl;dr:
Don’t sign broad non-competes. Ever. Under any circumstances.
Don’t sign away the rights to something a company can’t use/exercise.
Don’t be afraid to negotiate.
Don’t be afraid to walk away (unless, again, you would end up on the street/without health insurance/etc).
Make sure you double check the numbers. My pay is standardized by the federal government, and every year I get a cost of living adjustment, in addition to a small raise. In my latest contract, the university used old numbers, stiffing me what would have been about 2K over the year. Don’t sign contracts you haven’t read.
push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise.
push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable.
get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else.
stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything.
buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice.
buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small.
strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full.
organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle.
have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck.
push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog.
message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through.
think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything.
become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends.
lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.
This is all really good advice for dealing with long term depression and anxiety. It’s not gonna magically cure you, but I’ve pushed myself to incorporate a few of these things into my day to day routine and it helps
